Change is scary....even the disciples knew it.

I heard an excellent sermon on Sunday when I visited Beach Parish with friends.


The Gospel lesson for this week comes from a portion of the John's Gospel. {14:1-14} has Christ reassuring His disciples that His mission will continue, even though He will no longer be with them " in the flesh


" Jesus opens today's lesson with " Do not let your hearts be troubled. Believe in God, believe also in Me. In my Father's house there are many dwelling places....that's where I am , there you may be also." The priest mentioned that this is part of Jesus' ' farewell discourse' with His disciples & friends. Until recently, I had not give much thought to the importance of farewell discourses in everyday life.


Lately I've been feeling " lost" and " at a loss" due to some circumstances that I cannot change. I'm struggling seeing the face of Christ amidst all the chaos. I am struggling to find my own sense of " community" within my community. I feel directionless.


Right now I wonder where my own role within said community should be & I'm struggling with finding trustworthy mentors.  Jesus prepared his disciples for life with Him on Earth, but how often do we have ANY preparation for major changes in life?  Usually we are left in the storms of life to basically " sink or swim'. And I feel like I am sinking. I need to feel safe to  let go...and for me the process of healing includes communication regarding the changes with those whom I love. I need some " farewell discourse" in times of transition. When this discourse does not happen, I feel a literal pain that will not go away.


Am I the only one who requires some sort of closure in transitions?

Navigating the " Storms " Psalm 121

Anyone who has followed the news at all these last couple of weeks knows about the intense storms that the Gulf Coast endured massive rainstorms . the resulting flooding has left many Gulf Coast residents with flood damage.




 Best Dude and I managed to get by with minimal flooding on out bayou-front property { our " bayou " is really a creek back where we live}  Our neighbors were not so blessed. Two lots down the road from our home the entire house flooded. Although the water has abated, the owners obviously suffered a great deal of loss.




Currently I am going through a " storm" of sorts in my own life. Without delving into much detail, suffice it to say that I feel " displaced". Part of my community has been disturbed , and I feel sadness and fear from not knowing what the future holds.




 I struggle with trusting people and their motivations and I fear for the future as I know it now.  As someone with Autism, change of any sort frightens me.  I've never been one who claims patience as a virtue, and the state of " not knowing" is to me worse than even a bad outcome that is certain.




People with no or limited knowledge of Autism cannot fathom the stress that ANY change causes we people with Autism. Our brains respond the best to a routine, and when that routine is broken { for whatever reason] it causes our " fight or flight" mode to go in high gear.




Am I " taking flight" to avoid this current stressful situation?


Yes and no.


During the immediate chaos that surround any change, the emotions of others always are high. I cannot deal with those stress-induced hormones, so the best thing for me is to remove myself from the stressful situation.




I am useless when it comes to cleanup after any " storm". The best way I can be of help is to step back and stay out of the way.




A priest at another parish that I attend sometimes reminded readers in the monthly parish newsletter that God is with us---no matter what type of storm { Physical, emotional, and especially spiritual---all have the potential to cause chaos. }




Psalm 121 says : " I lift up my eyes to the hills---
from where does my help come?
                              " my help comes from the LORD,
Who makes Heaven and Earth.
                              He will not let your foot be moved
He who keeps you will not
                              slumber. "


This is what I must remember as I move forward in faith. Even when I do not sense God, our God is there. People are unpredictable, but God is constant. In fact, God and that God's own Son gave His life for us is the ONLY constant in this chaotic world.


Alleluia. Amen.

+ Desmond Tutu's 30 day " Forgiveness Challenge

I know the penitential season of Lent is over & done with for another year, but a good friend of mine introduced me to Archbishop Tutu's " 30 Day Forgiveness Challenge{ Google it!!} Although this challenge is based upon a book that the archbishop write with his daughter { she is also an Episcopal priest], one need NOT buy the book in order to participate in the challenge.


Another interesting aspect of this challenge, is that although written by an Anglican bishop,  the day's sessions are for anyone & everyone, regardless of a person's faith affiliation { or lack thereof, as a case may be} Each day's reading is followed by at least one " assignment" Participants work at their own pace.


I am only on Day 3, but I look forward to each part of this " journey" towards forgiveness.


Amen.