April is Autism Awareness Month & I feel moved to discuss bullying. Many people with autism experience bullying in school and { Sadly} this behavior towards those of us with ANY " difference" can continue into adulthood.
I was severely bullied as a child & teen. In retrospect, I know now that my tormentors didn't know how to approach my { at the time unknown but obvious} "difference" & therefore my behavior made me a target for verbal cruelty.
It took me YEARS of therapy & soul-searching, but I am at a place in my life now where I can forgive those who tormented me in school. However, to forgive does not mean that I should FORGET the pain such taunting has caused for me.
Bullies do not realize the painful memories that their actions impose on victims... we grow up with a distorted self-image. For instance even now I am very sensitive to criticism { even constructive criticism} from others. My autism makes it almost impossible for me to deduce social cues, so I am suspicious of motives of people whom I do not know well. As I've matured I've grown a bit more aware of social cues{is this REALLY a good thing after all---humans are such emotional creatures!} & am better at recognizing bullies & attempts to bully others.
I hope that my experience with bullying has helped me grow as the person I am & still am becoming. Yet when I see others being bullied or manipulated it " raises my hackles" . There should be no excuse for bullies to continue their cruel behavior into adult life. Yet sadly I have known several such adults in my life & I struggle with accepting them as they are...memories of my school days surface & I get angry.
I've read studies that say that some people who are severely tormented by bullies become bullies later in life but I am living proof that this statistic need not be the norm. As someone who experienced bullying firsthand how bullying affects some one's life I make a point to encourage ACCEPTANCE of people who are " not like us".
Amen.
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